No Glitter

Crafty time!

xo!
Em
It's a little late to get things shipped in time for holiday gifts, but...it's never too late to shop for yourself. :D zombietoes

Holiday Emily

Heeey... I kind of disappeared on you guys, huh? My bad. (Yeah I still say that).
I don't know where I've been, I think probably at work.
I did pick up a second job at a local video store (Yes, they still exist).
In the process of churning up the energy and time to get some new comics inked and colored and posted for your entertainment.
There are piles of thumbnail sketches and lists of ideas on colorful scraps of paper littering my desk. Inspiration is not lacking.
Motivation, however, is lacking.
The epic worker in me is saying "All the greats just sit down and work, whether or not they feel like it" but the silly hippie in me is all like "Ah, just relax and take a break, man." And then there is Holiday Emily, who is basically like "Fuck this, fuck that, fuck you, fuck everything, I need a drink." So that's where I'm at right now. But here's a seasonal comic for you at this time:



In other news, I have a small sale running in my zombietoes etsy shop


this week- 15% off your order with the code 15TOES at checkout. This code expires next Tuesday (Dec 10) so go now. I have new small prints of some of my cartoon animal art, and zombie prints, Ralphies, all sorts of fun stuff, all made by me.

xo!
Em

Real Life Sucks

Uh...hey there. Sorry, I totally disappeared from the internet for awhile. This is more or less why:



xo!
Em

New stuff on the way to my zombietoes shop in the next few weeks!

M + M + m&ms

Tom Waits says "when life gets you down, and you've lost all your dreams, there's nothing like a campfire, and a can of beans". This is my personal version of that (though life is not getting me down at the moment):



xo!
Em

Get your Halloween goodies here: zombietoes

bear and rabbit

Something a little different:



xo!
Em

zombietoes.etsy.com

Some Preferences Take Precedence

xo!
Em

You'd just let me starve to death, wouldn't you? If I starved to death, who the hell would make you laugh? hmmm??

RESPECT

xo!
Em
Go shopping. zombietoes. Because I said so.

Pork Nose

xo!
Em

zombies. toes. zombietoes.

Employee of the Month

xo!
Em

Defibber

xo!
Em

Peanut Butt-Hurt

xo!
Em
My finances know ALL ABOUT butt-hurt, haha! That's a good reason to pick up some handmade awesomeness at zombietoes.

Alotta Monsters- an art post.

Skipping the comic this week, because I have been severely overworking myself and she said I could take it easy today...'she' being me, haha. Basically, I have been sewing and sewing and apparently I have been painting, too, but for the life of me I can't remember when I did that. I cleared off my desk yesterday, after a 4 day sewing marathon, and found a few 'in progress' pieces and one completed one! Let me show you what I mean:


What I've been sewing


More sewing stuff


Oh, yes, and I made a WHOLE BUNCH of key chains, too!


Aaand, the array of paintings I discovered during clean-up

If you are a person who has called or emailed me in the last week or two, and gotten ZERO response, this is why, and I do apologize! (If you are a person that I have NOT ignored in the past two weeks, then you are really extra special and you probably helped me with this stuff, so THANK YOU!) So, the ONE completed painting I have- "Ten Monsters"- is listed in my zombietoes etsy shop (the direct link is below the picture):


"Ten Monsters" original painting

Also listed in my etsy shop are some Monster Bags and some Key Chains with more to come!

On top of all the new, fun stuff, I have a coupon code! Use 7ZOMBIES at check out for $7 off purchases of $15 or more. Coupon is good until Monday, July 15th. Don't forget I also have a lot of comic related prints, zombie stuff, and T SHIRTS, for Satan's sake do not forget about the T SHIRTS!!!

xo!
Em
In case you missed the subtle message in this week's post: zombietoes.etsy.com

Landscaping

"Do you talk to your mother that way?!" "No, but I do talk to myself that way. Is that bad?" Hahahaha!

xo!
Em
I'm not gonna shut up about this: zombietoes.etsy.com

Fantasia Bathroom

Seriously, it's like a touch-free car wash. I just want to know...WHY?!?

xo!
Em
You guys, I have tons of crazy fun stuff in my shop, please take a moment to check it out, maybe even share the link? zombietoes.etsy.com

The Cut-Off

Take it however you can get it, I guess.

xo!
Em
T shirts, bags, puppets, art, hilarious pictures, prints, zombies, monsters...get some: zombietoes.etsy.com

It's T Shirt Time!!! Oh Yeah!

If you read the title of this post in Pauly D's voice, thank you. As disgusting as I find The Jersey Shore to be, I will admit I have watched more than my fair share of it, and have been thoroughly amused. Why, you ask? I wish I had an answer for you. But do not worry, I no longer have cable TV, and no time for watching shows. ;)

Let me tell you about T Shirts.
I have them. They are awesome and special, they are a small limited edition run (for now) and you want one. No, you NEED one. This round, I have gone with my previously unreleased cartoon art "Merry Go Hound". I have assorted sizes, styles, and colors, though most of them are geared towards the ladyfolk (sorry, men, I'm working on some for you!)


Click here for all the T Shirts!

Most of them are $20 + a small amount for shipping, though I do have one that is not perfect (for less $) and one tank top for $18.

In addition, I have a limited edition run of "Merry Go Hound" screen printed in red ink on yellow cardstock available. There are only 7 of them, they are 8" x 10", signed, numbered, titled, etc...AND...because I LOVE you all so MUCH, I've marked them at a lower price ($12 as opposed to $16) than my usual 8" x 10" print price. Awwwe, how sweet of me!! You can get one (or more!) at the link below:


Merry Go Hound art prints!

If you ever wanted to buy your dog some art, this would be the piece to get!

I had a lot of help and inspiration for these shirts, and when you purchase one, some of the money from that goes directly to the person who helped me, and we both thank you profusely. Plus, that gives me more wiggle room to make more, different, and super fabulous shirts! Also, I'm getting really sick of working for THE MAN, so any time you want to buy something, that gets me a little bit closer to buying a giant mansion to house all my friends. You want to be my friend and help me out, now, don't you? If you can't buy, sharing is just as good- word of mouth is EXTREMELY HELPFUL and FREE, and means A WHOLE LOT to me. Seriously. For real. One click. Remember all those times I made you laugh, for no reason other than I love to see you laugh? Well, payback time. Make me smile, it's not that hard!

xo!
Em

All the other awesome things at zombietoes!

Captain Fantasy

I know he looks like Weird Al, but he's not- this is Captain Video (also Captain Candy). I visit this dude once a week to rent a stack of really bad movies.



xo!
Em

Monsters. Comics. Toys n stuff. Total Fun: zombietoes

Fox fox FOX fox Foxes, some foxes, and a Fox.

Fox. Okay. This "character" actually came from me being a dork, sketching out one of my origami foxes one day while I was probably supposed to be doing something else, something most likely important and adult-like. This is when I find I do my most...self accepting work. That's where Ralphie came from, a doodle from thin air, just there in a moment of life where I was all like "What the Fuck is the Point of Anything?" Don't pretend like you've never hit that point before. If you haven't, well...you are lacking essential experience. That's what I'll say to make us all feel better. Yeah.

I would liken these "epiphany doodles" to...the penis showing game in the movie "Waiting". Yeah. It's like that. It's like, my mind just cracks, and I short out for a bit. I stand, obstinate as an overtired toddler, in the face of responsibility and obligation, screaming as I rip off my diaper, and then I poop everywhere. Yeah, it's like that. Folks, if you came here just to look at some cute foxes, I am so so sorry. I get carried away with my thoughts. And I am disgusting some (most) of the time.

You may remember this sketch:



and the work in progress blog I posted awhile back (it's here)...

Well....Here is the original, completed painting, "Fox and Weasel"! It's an 11" x 7" acrylic on masonite piece, blah blah, all that info, purchase info, and more pictures and a poem are at the link below:


"Fox and Weasel" original cartoon art painting on etsy

I really wish I could paint something like this on a big wall. And that someone would pay me handsomely for performing such an amazing feat.

Moar Foxes Now! *This* is a piece I am REALLY fond of and kind of do not want to list, but...I am not in a financial position to be able to afford my own art at the moment. Yes, it is like that. I console myself with the fact that I can always get a poster or print. Not having it around could possibly lead to creation of more like it. Things of that nature. Nature. Walking. This is "Fox Walk"- an original 8.5" x 11" pen and ink illustration, cut around the edges and backed with a lovely chocolate-colored cardstock. Mmmm. Chocolate. I had to trim and back it the way I did because I messed it all up...but thankfully in a way that was fixable. Mistakes often lead to something new that you'd never think of before. I had a ton of fun with this piece. It makes me want to go pick blackberries. Mmmm. Blackberries. Okay. Anyhoo...


"Fox Walk" original cartoon fox illustration on etsy

That's it for now. These are both available for purchase/adoption. Even though I want to keep them. *whine* :D

xo!
Em

Main link to my shop: zombietoes.etsy.com

5 a.m. Email

If you have ever received a rather (or should I say EXTRA) bizarre correspondence from me, chances are it was composed and sent VERY EARLY in the morning. Probably not the best practice.



xo!
Em

Fun Times at zombietoes

Kevlar

This is more of a winter-themed comic...but what the hell. Also, new character...Kevin, better known as Kevlar...getting ready to face a night walk in the winter time. If you have never had to walk miles in the cold, dark, snowy winter, then...well, you have not lived, my friend.



xo!
Em

Z OM b I E T o E s!

Saucemata

Every mess has a hilarious lining. At least that's what I tell myself.



xo!
Em

Seriously, focking go the fock shopping, fockers. xxoo! zombietoes

High Five Cat

This happened the other day. I love this man, even though he is a cat.

xo!
Em

SHHHHopppppping: zombietoes

Slip and Slime

The day job can get really greasy, especially if there is an Androo around...and there usually is one.



xo!
Em
Don't forget about my shop! zombietoes.etsy.com

Cartoon Creatures- Narwhales and Dinosaurs!

Hihihihi!!! :D
So, it's art time again!! I hope you guys don't mind...I can really only tell from my blog view stats, but it seems you do not mind at all, and for this I am very gracious! See me bow to you and thank you with dorky smiles! I really enjoy creating these picture worlds and stories and characters, so...it's nice to know they are at least being seen :) Blah blahblah blah...anyhow, let me show you two new pieces!! Here is a small 5" x 7" acrylic painting - "Impaley Narwhalies" - see more at the link below the picture:


"Impaley Narwhalies" original cartoon art painting on etsy

Yeah, yeah, I know...ANOTHER sea creature painting?!!? I can't help myself. I'm pretty sure I have spent a fair amount of lifetimes in the ocean. It's one of my favorite places to take my mind and let it wander. A vacation of sorts. Hmmm...

Onto the next, then! This one went through a long stage of "OMG this looks like crap". Due to my stubborn nature, I just kept working on it until I could stand to look at it, and was not ashamed to put my name on it. Really, it was that bad! There are a few work in progress shots on my facebook page here: W.I.P.s

It is all finished now, and I've titled it "Prehistoric Parade", though...it is neither technically accurate on prehistoric life, nor is it in a parade-like fashion. Regardless, I am the artiste, and whatever I say is what is taken as word in my land, haha! In your face, reality! *Ahem* So, here is "Prehistoric Parade":


"Prehistoric Parade" original creature illustration on etsy

This one is an original 8.5" x 11" pen and ink illustration on bristol. Thought maybe I should be profeshunalllll for half a second ;)

I hope you have enjoyed my colorful monster-creature-dinosaur-animal art! I will have a new comic later this weekend, and I also will have a fox art post for you in the next week or so. Don't forget, it's Mother's Day on Sunday. Call your Mums.

xo!
Em

Your support is always very appreciated (meow)- zombietoes.etsy.com

Landry

Well.
I'm not sure how to open this post.
So I'll just go at it:

Lost some folks in April.
The loss of this particular individual touched me deeper than I thought it would, perhaps because of the timing- please read.

Yours is the very first name in my phone contact list. I only ever called you when you were super late to work...which was often enough that I would bother to save your number.
You always greeted me with one of two things- "Hey Creepy!" or "Hey Gorgeous!"- equally hilarious and fitting. Of course, this is how you greeted most people. Still, it had its charms.
I never spent any time with you outside of work. I wouldn't say we were friends, though we got along well enough. You knew every word to every song ever written, and who sung it, what year, who the hell the drummer was, how many covers were made, and by which singers...you knew so much goddamn music trivia. Why you were never a radio station DJ is beyond me. I once had to go home and look up "Eiffel Tower" because I got trapped in the walk-in with you and Tron for, like, ten seconds one day. I also remember the time a bottle of grenadine flew off the shelf at you and smashed on the floor. We talked about ghosts a lot, which is a strange thing to reflect on now, but then again...it really isn't.
I'm not going to sit here and blather on about all the good things you did and whatever, because, like I said...I never really knew your life. I only knew you- the flail scene, the joker, the risk taker, the hungover, the really pissed off, the kind of pissed off, the reckless, loving living a little too much, the clean, the dirty...the Landry. I do choose to remember you fondly, however, because...people like me need to have the influence of people like you.


Click to view larger

xo XO!!
Em

Because I had to take some time off work for another death (in the family) I would REALLY EXTRA appreciate any patronage these days! Please don't think this is some sick marketing ploy, it is more like...it is my FIRST job to take care of the people I love when they call on me, and sometimes that means calling out of work, and suffering a bit financially. zombietoes.etsy.com

C Cups

This happened last week. What a rough morning. Also, it happened yesterday morning, but I did not flail as badly.

xo!
Em
Support your favorite cartoon lady and buy the cool stuff she makes! zombietoes.etsy.com

Dorkling Art Hour- critters and rambling...plus a work in progress!

It's Art Time, y'all! You will get a comic later this week, I swear it! For now, though, you will have to indulge in some cartoon-y, lowbrow, giggle-inducing critters! Let me introduce you to "Mel"- Mel is a lone jellyfish, based on my older "Kellie, Ellie, and Nellie" Cartoon Aquarium painting, which was so much fun to paint, I thought I'd make some more!
"Mel" is a small 5" x 7" acrylic painting on a canvas panel- he is available for purchase through my etsy shop (just click on the link below, or the picture):


"Mel" original jellyfish painting

Now, I know I paint a lot of sea creatures. I don't know why, really, I just do. Some things are just better left to mystery. Of course, from time to time I also paint OTHER critters, such as "Gurble":


"Gurble" original monster art

This rabid little monster is one of my favorites, and always makes me laugh...especially when I am in the studio working on something frustrating. I look up, and he is there, making the same faces and noises that I am...He is also available for purchase at the link above :)

I recently drew this in my sketchbook:



I decided this morning that it needs to be a painting. So, that's happening now- a few work in progress shots for ya:






Weee!! I love to paint. I mean, I love my pens and my markers, but sometimes I can't do what I want with them. This is what I'm up to. Don't worry, I did go outside today :P
I suppose I should also tell you to stay tuned for some more work in progress pics and the final painting...and the comic, of course!

xo!
Em
Not into art so much? Well, I make other things, too: zombietoes.etsy.com

Miss Communication

If you don't get it, you should not have slept through health class in high school. Dang, I kind of just sounded like a high school health teacher...

xo!
Em
So...(plug plug plug)zombietoes.etsy.com

Rainbow Puppies

So...I am a bit overworked lately-- if you know me, my admission of this fact alone should give you a good idea of HOW MUCH WORK that actually is-- and if you do not know me, you are a lucky lucky son of a gun. ;P In any case...Here is something my friend Lesley says from time to time, when she is overwhelmed: "I just need some place where I can go for an hour and hang out with a bunch of dogs". Smart lady, that Lesley. Sometimes, when I am super busy and I can't get to a dog, I close my eyes and...there they are! In RAINBOW!!! Hahahahaha!!!



xo!
Em
Restocking things here and there...go check it out: zombietoes.etsy.com

Handy Reminder

Well, Eminem says a lot of truth is said in jest, and I will agree with him 100% on that. I actually agree with that guy on quite a bit, aside from the "...there's no such thing, like a female with good looks who cooks and cleans"-- and I forgive him for that line, because OBVIOUSLY he has not met me.



This isn't true ALL time, just when I feel backed into a corner, or trampled on, or generally ignored...and honestly, I am sensitive as hell. There. I said it. Go ahead and use it against me if you like the taste of your own blood.

Thank you for allowing me to vent. PLEASE laugh if you feel inclined, and don't feel badly about it, because laughing is the best cure for lots of things. That is, after all, the main force behind this comic :)

xo!
Em

(insert obligatory funny remark here) zombietoes.etsy.com

Just a Friendly Kitchen Tip

xo!
Em
PS- GO SHOPPING!! zombietoes.etsy.com

Vitamins

Sometimes, you gotta trust the dark side...



xo!
Em
Shopping therapy works! --> zombietoes.etsy.com

Cartoon Ocean Art- Tad, Fish Hands, and Burt

Hallo! This is not a comic post...and for that I am sorry, but Christ on a crucifix, I cannot be funny ALL the TIME!!
*ahem* THIS post is about ART! CARTOONS! Dorky pictures I drew and would like to share with you! :D

Today's theme: the ocean! Why? I have been fascinated-verging-on-obsessed with the ocean for as long as I can recall. The quaint-looking (but wicked harsh) New England seaside is one of my first memories. Also...Puff the Magic Dragon lived by the sea...and we all know how I love me some magic dragons! But seriously, the most compelling reason, for me, to love the ocean is all the UNKNOWN out there. Out there, under the water that covers MOST of our planet. Think about it. Whoa, man, right? Of all the weird creatures my imagination could conjure up, there is something EVEN weirder lurking right next to us, but we just can't see it.
Anyway, enough rambling, how about some pictures? Three of my lowbrow water critter illustrations for you to feast your eyes upon:

"Tad"


Tad is all alone, totally lost, and extremely socially awkward (but has a heart of gold). He also looks pretty dern tired if you ask me.
The original painting is HERE
open edition 8" x 10" prints are HERE.

"Fish Hands"


I...don't even know. I just do not know.
The original illustration is HERE
I do not have prints available at this time, but if you want to nag me about it, feel free ;) Uh, actually, make sure you gauge my mood before you start the nagging. (Just some advice from a fickle person.)

"Burt"


Burt wants you to know what he's talking about... But he's not actually speaking, because this octopus has no mouth! Hope you can read eyelids...
The original illustration (framed!) is HERE!
I do not have prints of him available yet, either, but again with the nagging thing...feel free.

So, those are some of my arts. I will do more of these posts in the future, perhaps one a month? Why am I asking you? :P I hope you've enjoyed the display :) Tell you friends, tell your mom. <3

xo!
Em
Not into art so much? Well, I make other things, too: zombietoes.etsy.com